No more binging.
Although I've had thoughts of purging, it is something that I am mentally and physically incapable of. There's something about vomiting that I cannot do. The lost time I did it was when I was partying, and I have little recollection of that.
But I always end up binging after trying so hard to eat healthy.
Yogurt and cauliflower and apples becomes cake and fast food and ice cream.
I try so hard to control myself but I can't. I just want to be really thin and healthy. I'm not just doing it for the way my body LOOKS, but also for the way my body FEELS. I want to stay away from sugar because I eat too much of it, and do not want to end up diabetic and later on regret what I have done. The sooner I change my habits, the better. And it starts NOW.
Now. Now it something I always say, but never happens. But this time. I'm. Serious.
Saturday, 8 March 2014
Saturday, 22 February 2014
Grade 11
Is a struggle.
My journey from grade 9 to 10 was easy. However, there has always been a noticeable "bump" that I occur every year. It is my lack of intelligence in math. I am in no way mathematically smart. For some reason, I can handle chemistry equations, but linear equations? HA.
Here's a tip. Never listen to your genius brother. Because he's a genius. And he thinks if he can handle it, so can you. Because it seems easy. To him. But it's not. Yeah.
Take physics, he said. It'll be fun, he said. HAH. I've never felt so stressed over simple BEDMAS equations. Velocity= smd. Acceleration= idgaf. What's 25 m/s converted to km/h? WHO GIVES A FUCK GAYUAGUGAFSDA.
On top of physics, I have math, which isn't too fun either. A girl who hates math is not going to enjoy it. I like math more, however, because there is less involvment. It is independent. If you don't get something, the teacher'll come over and help you. But in physics, there's group work and my teacher just randomly picks you to answer the question. And since i'm stupid and don't get it, I never have and never will have the answer. My anxiety is through the fucking roof in that class!
Which is exactly why I'm so keen in pursuing this whole dental hygienist career. No math required. But my three fave subjects are: chem, bio, and English. And I'm good at all 3 of those! HOLLA!
My journey from grade 9 to 10 was easy. However, there has always been a noticeable "bump" that I occur every year. It is my lack of intelligence in math. I am in no way mathematically smart. For some reason, I can handle chemistry equations, but linear equations? HA.
Here's a tip. Never listen to your genius brother. Because he's a genius. And he thinks if he can handle it, so can you. Because it seems easy. To him. But it's not. Yeah.
Take physics, he said. It'll be fun, he said. HAH. I've never felt so stressed over simple BEDMAS equations. Velocity= smd. Acceleration= idgaf. What's 25 m/s converted to km/h? WHO GIVES A FUCK GAYUAGUGAFSDA.
On top of physics, I have math, which isn't too fun either. A girl who hates math is not going to enjoy it. I like math more, however, because there is less involvment. It is independent. If you don't get something, the teacher'll come over and help you. But in physics, there's group work and my teacher just randomly picks you to answer the question. And since i'm stupid and don't get it, I never have and never will have the answer. My anxiety is through the fucking roof in that class!
Which is exactly why I'm so keen in pursuing this whole dental hygienist career. No math required. But my three fave subjects are: chem, bio, and English. And I'm good at all 3 of those! HOLLA!
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